A Cup of Coffee Amid Chaos

As I begin this post, I am sedately drinking a cup of coffee at my favorite coffee shop. My husband is sitting across from me, and we are chatting peacefully about very ordinary things--the weather,  paint colors, the croissant we are sharing.

To look at us, a stranger would think it was just another ordinary moment in an average couple's lives. Little could said stranger know that this ordinary couple's universe has been careening wildly through chaos for the last nine days and has finally come to a jolting halt in a moment of "normal." We sit there trying to find our bearings as the world seems still to sway underneath us.

I am vaguely aware of the rhythmic rush of blood through my veins as I grope for something stable to brace my unsteady thoughts. *Thump *Thump. God's good. *Thump *Thump. Praise Him. My thanks to God echo with every heartbeat, as I find myself more aware than ever before that God is granting my every moment.

It has been some time since I posted any "musings." There has been a lot of water under the bridge since then. Doug is gone. So is a little life of only a few weeks Michael and I created together. Since my last post, I have had many opportunities to test whether I believe what I said in my last entry about God's purpose through pain. As I reread my last post, I can confidently say that I believe every word I wrote back then.

In the last nine days, Michael and I transformed with little warning from excited parents contentedly preparing for our child's arrival in three months to overwhelmed new parents, living in a different city and caring for our premature son, who was born at 28 weeks, in a Neonatal Intensive Care Unit.

We are grateful to be together--grateful for our son's survival. And yet, as we celebrate these gifts, we are mourning the loss of Michael's Grandpa Ernie and my Aunt Myrna. That's a lot to take in. No wonder we feel wobbly on our intellectual feet, as if we just stopped spinning.

In the insanity that has been our lives for the last nine days, the one firm place we have been able to stand has been on God's promises. We have seen His hand at work in every situation, and, even through our pain, we are overflowing with praise for Him.

In the next few blog posts, I will tell you a little about my and my little one's new lease on life. I'll share some pictures as well, since they seem to be in high demand. I hope our story will inspire you to say, as I can't help but do, "Praise the Lord!"